My friend has invited me to a party. I said I would go but the stuff they do is not my cup of tea. What shall I do?
(Male: 10 - 12)
Too often in life we all find ourselves doing stuff and going to things that we do not want to. But it is essential that we learn to say 'no' when it is important to us. On this occasion I would tell a little white lie to spare your friends feelings, think of a good excuse, like your family are doing something you have to join in with, and say to your friend that unfortunately something has come up and you can no longer make it. For the future, if you do not want to go somewhere, it would be better to say so straight away, or say that you cannot remember what you are doing and will have to get back to them, this gives you time to think up an excuse if you do not want to go. Good luck.
I like this boy in my year he is really fit but I don't think he even notices me, I don't want to go up to him because I'm scared he will laugh at me. I also haven't told any of my friends about it, I want to, but I just haven't got the guts. What do I do?
Female: 10 - 12
Life can be really hard at times can't it? There is no reason why he should laugh at you and you have to stop thinking negatively, he may be pleased you have approached him. Try and find out his interests so you can talk to him about something he likes, ask him for his mobile number or email address and then spark up a conversation with him through those methods, which you may find easier. You are going to have to find the courage to speak to him at some point, if you want to go out with him. Don't tell your friends unless you really trust them, as they may make things more difficult for you if they tell him. Good luck.
This guy keeps saying he likes me and says all this stuff but he has a girlfriend and he moved away from her into the UK and lived closer to me but he doesn't wanna break up with his girlfriend what do I do?
(Female: 13 - 15)
Your problem is ringing alarm bells. You state that this guy has moved to the UK to be nearer you, but doesn't want to break up with his girlfriend back home. Not once in your problem have you written how you feel about him. My advice is to steer clear of this guy, he clearly wants the best of both worlds and you are worth more than that. Good luck.
There is this boy I really like at school. I asked him out but he rejected me. The problem is, I'm really different. I'm really tall and big compared to the people in year 7 at my school. He asked out another girl, but I get the feeling he regrets it. He keeps looking at me and flirting with me. Should I just give up, if not, what should I do?
(Female: 10-12)
You obviously think a lot of this boy, otherwise you wouldn't want to give him a second chance. I am not sure you will like my advice but I would play it cool, let him know you are still interested by being nice to him and talking to him, but let him do the chasing. Then you are in control and you are worth more than keep asking him out.
My boyfriend never talks to me and I think he is interested in another girl, he is a year older and I would be better if we were just friends.
(Female: 10 – 12 years)
As you point out one of the most important things in any relationship is being able to talk to your chosen partner and when you both stop talking it becomes uncomfortable and not very enjoyable. It is hard for me to tell if your boyfriend is interested in another girl, but you obviously have your suspicions, although to be fair to him, there may be a number of reasons why he isn’t talking to you – you could try one last time and ask him why you both do not talk like you used to. If that fails then, as you suggest, it may be better to tell him that you just want to be friends. Good luck
My mate keeps ditching me and I'm left on my own. All my other mates are always busy so I have nothing to do in the afternoons and weekends.
(Male: 12)
I am really sorry to hear about your problem. You could develop a new hobby, interest or sport, maybe join a club - that's a fantastic way to meet new people and make new friends. If you want to, the other thing you could do is find out what your mates are up to and see if you can join them. Good luck - I am sure things will improve.
I have just found out that my best friend is moving away. We really
get on well and talk about anything. What am I going to do? (Male: 14)
I am sorry to hear that your friend is moving away, it's sad when we become
separated from people that we are close to. However, all is not lost! In these times of modern technology you will still be able to talk to your friend, all be it electronically. If you don’t have access to email or msm at home pop into a library or The Square café
in Hailsham if you live near there. Or you could write an old fashioned letter and post it. In the meantime, I'm sure your school runs many after school clubs. Why not
join some ? They provide an excellent opportunity to pursue interests and
make new friends at the same time.
